Sandra, 17 from Chandler, Arizona writes…

Hoping you can help doc. I’ve had this crush on a guy that has been in my classes for the past 2 years. I could never really get his attention, until finally the other night we ended up talking at a house party. My parents were out of town, so we went back to my place and made out. It was amazing, like a dream come true, he even came inside of me. But then things went really bad. As soon as we were done, he right away gathered his stuff, said goodbye and left out the door. Ever since he has completely ignored me, and when I tried to stop him to talk in the hallway between classes he turned the other way and walked off. Honestly I’m confused. Is it just that maybe he’s shy about what happened, or did he use me or what? It’s been a while since the night we made out, and I so want him, but I don’t know what he’s thinking. There isn’t anyone else I could possibly want. I really want this to work out between us!

Dr Thatslife has this to say….

Sandra, it’s called a one night stand, and whether you were attuned to the fact or not, you were involved in one that night. He was looking for nothing more or less from you than exactly what he got, to unload his yam bag into you. He couldn’t care less what you got out of it or what your anticipations of a future between the two of you may encompass. You were simply at the right place at the right time to fill his needs.

If you’re thinking that this physical encounter in some way establishes a relationship or an emotional connection between you, that would be wrong. Dickhead can easily romp with you in the sack, and walk off forgetting your name that very night. And any stimulating conversation and flirtatious banter you two may have had at the party were, in his mind, nothing more than an obstacle to getting your panties around your ankles.

So don’t be under the illusion that just because you two fucked, there is anything deeper going on here. Your best move at this point would be to press the reset button on this goof and start looking for a new guy to pine over. While this may be difficult, as you’ve probably spent two years building this from a puppy love crush to an obsession – mentally banishing this guy will help you to refocus on checking out other, most likely better guys for you.

That’s life!