Jokes Palace

Three Roses Joke

Jerkoff — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 13:43:23 +0000

A woman goes to her doctor and says she wants an operation because her vagina lips are much too large. She asks the doctor to keep the operation a secret, as she’s embarrassed and doesn’t want anyone to find out. The doctor agrees.

She wakes up from her operation and finds three roses carefully placed beside her bed. Outraged she immediately calls in the doctor and says, “I thought I asked you not to tell anyone about my operation!” “Don’t worry,” he says, “I didn’t tell anybody. The first rose is from me. I felt bad because you went through this all by yourself. The second one is from the nurse. She assisted me with the operation, and she had the operation done herself.” “Who is the third rose from?” she asked. “Oh,” says the doctor, “that rose is from the guy upstairs in the burn unit. He wanted to thank you for his new ears!”

Minister From Blister Limerick

Jerkoff — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 23:33:57 +0000

There was a young mister from Blister,
who knocked up his gal as he kissed her,
but he couldn’t afford,
a new baby on board,
so from then on he just had to fist her.

Daddy Drinks Because I Cry

Jerkoff — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 23:43:34 +0000

Whorehouse Door Joke

Jerkoff — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 14:51:11 +0000

Two drunks are standing at the front door of a whorehouse. The first drunk says, “I heard half these broads have the clap and that none of them would think twice about stealing every penny we’ve got.” The second drunk says, “Not so loud, or they won’t let us in.”

Gay Argument One Liner

Jerkoff — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 12:54:46 +0000

Q. Did you hear about the two gay guys that had an argument in the bar?

A. They went outside to exchange blows.

Sick Wife Joke

Jerkoff — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 13:31:58 +0000

The Doctor says ”Your wife either has Alzheimer’s or AIDS.” To which the husband asks ”How can we find out which?” The Doctor replies ”I need you to run a little experiment this weekend. Take your wife to a park and leave her there. If she finds her way home; don’t fuck her.”

Nun From Siberia Limerick

Jerkoff — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 23:33:47 +0000

There once was a nun from Siberia,
who was born with a virgin interior,
until a young monk,
jumped into her bunk,
and now she’s a mother superior.

Are You A Fart Connoisseur

Jerkoff — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 00:53:25 +0000

Farts often lead to frowns for all but the actual fart instigator. From that innocent, barely audible puttering fart done in church, to that death cloud apocalypse fart that has whole floors of office towers evacuated; do you dig your own flavor?

Mustang Warning

Jerkoff — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 23:43:25 +0000

Perfect Life Joke

Jerkoff — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 14:41:49 +0000

A man was complaining to his friend, “I had it all - money, a magnificent house, a fast car, the love of a beautiful woman… then, poof! It was all gone!” “What happened?” asked the friend. “My wife found out.”