|
|
|
There was an old man from China,
Who wasn’t a very good climber,
He fell on a rock,
Split his cock,
And now he’s got a vagina.
Renaldo, 28 from Las Vegas, Nevada writes…
I’ve been dating a stripper I met a few months ago at a club here in Vegas. She is wild, we have the best of times like you wouldn’t believe. We go out to party hard often, but we also take it easy and just stay at home. She is like the ultimate girlfriend. The problem is when she heads to work… it tears me apart every time I know she’s working the club. I can’t get out of my mind what she could be doing with the men there. I would hate for it to destroy what we have, but I can really see it heading in that direction. She’s never made me feel like shes playing around or hooking up with other guys outside of work, but its tough man… I wish she’d just have some simple job and I wouldn’t have to stress. What should I do?
Dr Thatslife has this to say….
You’ll either need to handle the fact that strange men will be glaring at and playing with her goodies, or it’s time to power down the relationship dude. You can’t really expect these pent up feelings of jealousy and stress to just magically disappear do you? They are there naturally because you have formed a relationship with this chick. When you started dating her you signed up for this, it’s not like you didn’t know… you were one of the drooling perverts in the front row with dollar bills falling out of your wallet, doing wolf calls while watching her act. So she’s probably a total hottie, and a blast to hang out with (i.e. perpetual fun), but that kind of fun is almost never a free ride, there’s strings attached.
What should you do? Ascertain how serious she intends this gig to be. Maybe she’s doing it till the end of winter, when she’ll get her diploma in flower arranging. In which case, if you can put up with the relentless line up of men jerking off at the thought of her a bit longer, you’re set. If she has grand visions of being a feature attraction at “Bradley’s Slut Pole and Tavern” for the foreseeable future, then you need to start hitting her with quality questions so you can figure out what to do.
Understand what part of her job causes the jealousy… is it the patrons seeing her naked or is it the possibility of physical contact and the occasional finger up the baby tube? If it’s the nudity, you’re fucked and drop out of the game now. It’s the very nature of what she does and who she is, and if you’re uncomfortable with that then you’re going to end up as a basket case - abort mission. If it’s the fondling hands and the tit sucking, then you may have a different situation on your hands. Ask her exactly what the policies of the club and the state you live, they may have an absolute zero tolerance for any kind of contact whatsoever.
Ask her what she personally is willing to do with a patron. Does she work the dark curtain booths at the back of the club for $300 an hour or is she simply a trick on the stage. Once you get down to the bottom of exactly what she does, and know what your limits are; perhaps you can make a more informed decision. You may find much less goes on than you thought. Think back to when you were there watching her act… was she getting finger fucked by everyone in the club, or just doing a regular striptease on stage? Finally, you need to really listen to your gut on this one. Her profession isn’t standard fare, you need to be alert and paying attention to details that you normally wouldn’t need to as much. Just because she says she would never let patrons touch her, doesn’t necessarily mean she isn’t getting circle jerked by fifty guys a night. If you feel what she says, or how she says it is out of whack, it probably is.
Good luck my friend. That’s life.

On their first night together, a newlywed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom showered and wearing a beautiful robe. The proud husband says, “My dear, we are married now, you can open your robe.” The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished.”Oh, oh, aaaahhh,” he exclaims, “My God you are so beautiful, let me take your picture. Puzzled she asks, “My picture?” He answers, “Yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to my heart forever”.
She smiles and he takes her picture, and then he heads into the bathroom to shower. He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, “Why do you wear a robe? We are married now.” At that the man opens his robe and she exclaims, “Oh, oh my, let me get a picture.” He beams and asks why, to which she answers, “So I can get it enlarged!”
Q. What’s the difference between men and government bonds?
A. Bonds mature.

A rescue team finds a crashed airplane. The lone survivor is chewing on a bone, with a huge pile of human bones next to him, and the rescuers are shocked. The survivor says, “You can’t judge me for this. I had to survive.” The leader of the rescue team says, “But Jesus Christ, man… your plane only went down yesterday!”
Q. Why do women stop bleeding when entering menopause?
A. Because they need all the blood for their varicose veins.

“That wife of mine is a liar.” said the angry husband to a sympathetic pal seated next to him in the bar. “How do you know?” the friend asked. “She didn’t come home last night, and when I asked her where she’d been, she said she’d spent the night with her sister, Shirley.” “So?” the friend replied. “So, she’s a liar. I spent the night with her sister Shirley!”
Next Jokes »
|
|
 |
| |
| Grant (Jan 25): You have the originality of a busker with a pan flute.
|
|
 |
|