Wedding Dress Joke Posted May 29th, 2008 in Dirty Jokes

A young lad on the eve of his wedding night asks his mother, “Mom, why are wedding dresses white?” The mother looks at her son and replies, “Son, this shows the town that your bride is pure.” The son thanks his mom, and later in the day meets up with his father and asks his opnion, “Dad, why are wedding dresses white?” The father looks at his son in surprise and says, “Son, all household appliances come in white.”

Little Willie Winkle Limerick Posted May 28th, 2008 in Rude Limericks

Little Willie Winkle,
with a thirst for gore,
stapled his sister to the door,
“Now Willie”, his mother said with humor quaint,
“Don’t do that, you’ll scratch the paint”.

Baby Boy Joke Posted May 27th, 2008 in Dirty Jokes

Happy with their two beautiful teenage daughters, but still wanting a son, a couple decided to try one more time. After months of effort, the wife finally became pregnant, and nine months later she delivered a baby boy.

The happy father rushed to the nursery to see his new son, but was horrified to discover the ugliest child he had ever seen. The man went back to his wife and said “There’s no way I could be the father of that baby! Look at the two beautiful daughters I’ve had!” He glared at his wife.

“Have you been fooling around on me?” The wife answered, ”Not this time.”

Keeping Warm Posted May 26th, 2008 in Funny Pictures

Grandfather Money Joke Posted May 26th, 2008 in Dirty Jokes

Tom’s grandfather left him ten million dollars and it was the very next week his long time girlfriend Jane agreed to marry him. After three months of married life, Tom noticed that his beautiful new wife was ignoring him more and more.

On the rare occasion that she would go to bed with him she would be indifferent, or even worse, called out other men’s names! Whenever they went out in public, she ignored him and flirted with other men. Finally, he decided to confront her. “Jane, the only reason you married me was because my grandfather left me ten million dollars when he died”

“Don’t be ridiculous…” she replied, “I don’t care who gave you the money!”

Drunken Bikers Joke Posted May 23rd, 2008 in Dirty Jokes

A policeman cruising past a pub after closing time notices two motorcycles still parked out front. The policeman goes round the back of the pub to find two bikers, one with his fingers up the ass of the other. “So what’s going on here?” he asks. The biker replies, “My mate here has had too much to drink and I’m trying to make him vomit.” The cop says, “I think you should be sticking your fingers down his THROAT.” The biker replies, “That’s what I’m going to do next!”

Man Named Ken Limerick Posted May 21st, 2008 in Rude Limericks

There once was a man named Ken,
who banged a girl in his den,
he knew something’s wrong,
when a wart grew on his shlong,
and now he’s in his den with Ben.

Mirror Five Posted May 19th, 2008 in Funny Pictures

Woman From Timbuktu Limerick Posted May 14th, 2008 in Rude Limericks

There once was a woman from Timbuktu,
who was still a virgin at twenty two,
till her boyfriend came along,
and pumped her all night long,
now she’s at home with a baby named lulu.

Gold Digger Posted May 12th, 2008 in Funny Pictures

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