Rude Limericks

Lass From Tacoma Limerick Posted January 19th, 2010 in Rude Limericks

I once knew a lass from Tacoma,
whose twat had a wondrous aroma,
when the lads took a whiff,
about half would get stiff,
the rest would fall into a coma.

Man From Pompei Limerick Posted December 31st, 2009 in Rude Limericks

There once was a man from Pompei,
who fashioned a snatch out of clay,
the heat from his prick,
turned the clay into brick,
and tore all his foreskin away.

Rabbi of Keith Limerick Posted December 10th, 2009 in Rude Limericks

There once was a Rabbi of Keith,
who circumsized men with his teeth,
it was not for the treasure,
nor sexual pleasure,
but to get at the cheese underneath.

Harlot From Kew Limerick Posted November 24th, 2009 in Rude Limericks

There was a young harlot from Kew,
who filled her vagina with glue,
she said with a grin,
“If they pay to get in,
they’ll pay to get out of it, too.”

Vampire Named Mable Limerick Posted November 8th, 2009 in Rude Limericks

There once was a vampire named Mable,
whose periods were really quite stable,
and every full moon,
she’d get out a spoon,
and drink herself under the table.

Young Woman Named Sally Limerick Posted November 3rd, 2009 in Rude Limericks

There was a young woman named Sally,
who loved an occasional dally,
she sat on the lap,
of a well endowed chap,
and said “You’re right up my alley!”

Girl Named Louise Limerick Posted October 22nd, 2009 in Rude Limericks

There once was a girl named Louise,
whose cunt-hair hung down to her knees,
so the crabs in her twat
tied the hair in a knot,
and constructed a flying trapeze.

Pirate From Yates Limerick Posted October 1st, 2009 in Rude Limericks

There once was a pirate from Yates,
who could dance the Fandango on skates,
he fell on his cutlass,
which rendered him nut-less,
and perfectly useless on dates.

Fellow Named Biddle Limerick Posted June 25th, 2009 in Rude Limericks

There was a young fellow named Biddle,
who was seldom hard up for a diddle,
and according to rumor,
his tool had a tumor,
and a fine row of warts down the middle.

Girl From Whick Limerick Posted June 9th, 2009 in Rude Limericks

There once was a girl from Whick,
who said to her Mum “What’s a dick?”,
she said “My dear Annie,
it goes up your fanny,
and jumps up and down till it’s sick.”

« Previous Jokes   |   Next Jokes »